“Stay Pregnant as Long as Possible…”

For 24 weeks and 5 days, my pregnancy was downright boring. Other than the whole two babies at once thing. My doctor’s favorite descriptive for me was “Textbook”. Until one day, specifically, March 23, 2012, at 24 weeks and 6 days pregnant, it wasn’t so boring anymore.

I was driving to work that afternoon and suddenly began to feel off. About an hour into my shift, the contractions began. After calling my doctor, I was told to go immediately to the hospital. I was terrified. It was WAY too early. It was just so wrong.

My mom met me at the hospital because my husband was out of town for work. I was taken to a triage room and hooked up to an assortment of monitors, and it was discovered that I was having contractions every two minutes. Shortly, a nurse brought me a little yellow pill called Procardia to try and stop my contractions and, as I swallowed that pill I knew that everything had changed. My idyllic pregnancy was over. I now had only one goal, one focus: Stay pregnant as long as possible.

I was sent home from the hospital that night, after my contractions slowed, with a bottle of those little yellow pills and ordered onto bed rest. It was time to fight for my daughters, and fight I did. For twelve long weeks I took my Procardia every six hours, I stayed in bed most hours of the day, I was at the doctor constantly for monitoring. I took more pills to keep myself healthy(ish) as my body began to slowly shut down. Then finally, at 36 weeks pregnant, my doctor congratulated me, told me I had done a good job growing two healthy girls. Then she said I could stop taking my little yellow pills. So I stopped and, a little over a week later, I finally met the sweet little angels I fought so hard for. It was magical.

A few days ago, I found the last of my Procardia in the back of the cabinet. I will likely never need to take those pills again, but I can’t bring myself to throw those last few pills away. When I found that bottle, all the memories of those terrifying and difficult weeks came rushing back to me, and I realized that I as approaching to anniversary of that journey’s beginning. I hope that none of you ever have to go through that experience or feel those feelings. But I know that some of you will, because these things happen all too frequently when you’re having twins. So I say to you the fight is long, the fight is hard, but it’s a fight you can win.



Cease Fire

I’m calling for a cease fire. Let’s put an end to all the judgement and the sideways glances and the outright bullying I see and hear on a daily basis between grown men and women.

Honestly, most of us are just trying to create the best possible lives for our children in the best ways we know and have available to us. We read and research, seek advice, and make the choices that we believe are best for us and our families. We feel good about those choices, too, or at least we do until we venture out into the world.

Once we leave the oasis of our homes, we realize that everyone has an opinion about those choices we feel so good about, often very different or even negative opinions, and they are more than happy to share with you. There will be people who will go out of their way to remind you at every opportunity what a horrible parent and person they believe you to be.

Every choice you make is somebody’s hot-button issue. Cloth diapers or disposable? Where do your babies sleep? Breastfeeding? Formula? A combination of both? Vaccines? Circumcisions? Homemade baby food, store bought, or baby led weaning? To Cry-it-Out or not to Cry-it-Out? All important choices to be made. But also all things that I’ve seen kind, loving parents bullied over. And I’m tired of it. Parents, especially new parents, need support more than anything. All the superiority and bullying is just sick, predatory, juvenile behavior.

So I hope you’ll join me and do what you can to change the tide of all the parental bullying. Support each other. Be kind to each other. Stand up and speak up for those who can’t or are afraid to speak up for themselves.